ICanHasLaptop

I officially now have a laptop, it is now officially connected to the Internet and I am officially the most happy little Vegemite ever.

Except for: SCREW THE "SCROLL BAR". It hurts ;_;

My Muse

-IvanovicCornetDellacqua-

-DjokovicFedererHewitt-

These people are prime examples of what I live for. Each of them play superb tennis, have the best morale on court and they are all incredibly talented. And not just within tennis.

Player Profiles: -

Ana Ivanovic
SERBIA

Ana could easily become a model after her tennis career. It would be Kournikova all over again minus the slut and the blonde.
Gosh, I would so turn for Ivanovic.
She has a regularly updated diary/blog. A rare occurance in pro players, I think. That's not to say that she isn't in as many tournaments as the others. She just creates more time for her diary. Perhaps it helps her game?
You're awesome, Ana. Number One.
http://www.anaivanovic.com/

Alize Cornet
FRANCEShe's a freakin' French Wiz! She plays piano, basketball can speak French fluently, I wouldn't doubt that she can speak Englsih fluently and she's learning German. It has got to take smarts to do all that and be an epic pro tennis player.
I really admire her. She always looks so sweet on court. Even when she's pissed off she manages to look like icing on the top of a cake. White and orange icing.
Simply a joy to watch.
http://www.alize-cornet.com/

Casey Dellacqua
AUSTRALIA
CASEY! Bloody Aussies. They're only disappointing because they play for my country. If they were Russian or something then I probably wouldn't care that sometimes they can't get their slice to work. Nonetheless Casey is brilliant. She's changed heaps. I swear she used to be blonde = OH! She uses Twitter! =D It's on her website xD Anyways. Didn't she, like, win the Aussie Open last year? That was a defining moment. Her injury needs to mend and she needs to get out of her rut so she can beat Serena. That would be wonderful.
On ya', Case.
http://www.caseydellacqua.com.au/

Novak Djokovic
SERBIA
Nole<3 We love you,buddy. The reason that this Serbian is so fantastic is because he did that tremendous smile when he thought that lob was going out that one time and it landed far in and-and-and-and....he smiled at it all =D like. It was so cute ^_^ Plus he beat Federer. Methinks that was the pinnacle of his career. Though he would beg to differ.
http://www.novakdjokovic.rs/

Roger Federer
SWITZERLAND

Fedex! The only Swiss in the game! And because of this you'd think I'd remember what country he's from? Wrong. I cannot for the life of me ever remember that he's a Swiss. Note to self *must learn to associate Federer with cheese*. He's so pretty =]] Look at him in his suit looking all shiny. Roger Feder is an absolute delight to watch. Who cares that he absolutely smashes everyone he plays he does it with styyyyyyyle. Unlike Serena. He makes every match compelling so much so that you can't tear yourself away.
His backhand gives me shivers in a good way.
http://www.rogerfederer.com/

Lleyton Hewitt
AUSTRALIA

Awwww. Little Lleyton. Am I the only one that thinks he looks like an elf? 'Cause he reminds me of an elf. He is short for a tennis player, though. 5'10" is kinda short for a man. I mean, some of my friends are 5'10".
Lleyton is the bestest ^_^ he's so fun to watch, gets the crowd going.
He's a persistent little bugger too. He's down, like 6-2 in the first set and he'll bump it up to a win. Shows how proffessional and committed he is to his tennis. He doesn't think a lot of himself but he's got self confidence and that gets him far.
His nickname's Rusty.
COME ON!
http://www.lleytonandbechewitt.com/

There you have it. My Muse. In your face, Stephenie Meyer. Your muse can't hit a ball at over 200km/ph can it? Hey, HEY?! Didn't think so.

Angels and Demons: A Tom Hanks Tribute

Okay, so I admit this post isn't about Tom Hanks. I just like the title :) But it kind of goes along the lines of what I'm talking about. If I was imitating Dan Brown by twisting Christianity. Which I'm not.

What I'm really on about is how damn corny all this 'I'm the Devil's Angel. I'll bite your head off during sex, but I'll make it feel good' bullshit is.

I do admit that the pictures are nice but, um, it is kind of outdated and annoying.

Am I the only one? Or do particular things just strike me as corny or tacky?

It's hard to explain the way I think about the term. Maybe it's the actual 'Angel's Devils' I dislike. Not that I've ever known any. Not that they actually exist.

Maybe it's the way in which people use the term?
Or maybe it's just the people that use the term.

The last one would make a lot of sense.

Aww - It's so god damn true

Sickeningly so

+

:\

Muppets R Us

What is the function of Ozzy Osbourne?
Does he exist simply to bite the heads off bats?

Sadly I couldn't find a picture *sarcastic sad face*

But I did find this. . .

That's what I thought.

=D

Made this post souly to show the kiddies that kermit can't do anything.

SEE, KIDS?! Did I destroy your worlds?!

I'm kidding. I love Kermit. D. Frog ^_^ and I think the ways in which he can avoid Miss. Piggy are admirable.

I salute you, Kermit.

If this doesn't scare you...

I don't know what will.

I'm watching you

Found this picture on an Internet Ad.

Ain't it awesome?

I LOVE this T-Shirt! Haha. Get it? Hey hey hey, get it? It's awesome I <3>

I like her jeans too =)

Found this on a website when I was looking for "Awesome pictures" it wasn't one of the "Awesome Pictures" specifically, but I think it's awesome.

Goooooooooooooooooooogle

Listening To: Mistubishi Colt - Tim Minchin
Listening To: Twilight - Vanessa Carlton
Listening To: Brand New Day - Dr. Horrible
Listening To: Canvas Bags - Tim Minchin
Listening To: Some People Have It Worse Than Me
Listening To: Out and In - Kate Miller-Heidke
Listening To: Mysterious Ticking Noise - Potter Puppet Pals
Listening To: Scar - Missy Higgins
Listening To: I Wish I Was Punk Rocker - Sandi Thom
Listening To: Rockstar - Hannah Montana
Listening To: Damn it - Blink 182
Listening To: Bounce Back - Stacie Orrico
Listening To: Worst Pies in London - Sweeney Todd
Listening To: Wasabi - Lee Harding
Listening To: So They Say - Dr. Horrible
Listening To: Girls Don't Like Boys - Good Charlotte

Blogspot is really starting to piss me off.
This is all the music I've listened to while creating this fucking post. And look how small it is?


FUCK BLOGSPOT!

I am really not in the mood for shit. So if you want to answer a question that I ask you? Be sure that you can back up your fucking answer.

The (ex)Politicians

Revisited =3

Mr. Barrack Obama

Oh yes, Yes He Can

Mr. Kevin Rudd

'Mr. Rudd'
Call him Kevin 'cause
he rocks it in '07
and '08/'09

Johnny Howard

Really rather radical of eyebrow

Bush
Yep, just Bush

I don't know what to say

LOOK OUT FOR SHOES!
._.

President V Prime Minister

Tim's at the start now! YAY!

He's so fucking rock

Inauguration :-

It has come to my attention that George Bush is still being called the President of the United States. But wait, I thought Barrack Obama was President. Well, he made the speech and everything didn't he? Is he actually the President or what?

The way I see it is, in America, they take 50 million times the amount of time to officially inaugurate their President than it does to inaugurate our Prime Minister.

I don't know, though. Maybe it's America to Australia TV delay. Maybe we're not important enough to get the news of the new President's inauguration the day it happens?

I cannot be bothered to actually find out, if it really interests you, then you can. I just thought it was interesting and I wanted something else I can put pictures in! =D


Below is a little timeline that I prepared earlier (WITH PICTURES xD)

See how small the gap is between Howard and Rudd? And how big the gap is between Bush and Obama?
(This has nothing to do with the fact that Rudd was elected in '07)

The gap represents the time it took to inaugurate the President/Prime Minister. The Howard/Rudd one is small because it took a short amount of time and the Bush/Obama one is long because it took a long amount of time (or so it seems)

This blog is for the soul commemoration of Australia's awesomeness and America's badness and its slowness.

XD

\/\/\/Comment \/\/\/

Swarley

Neil Patrick Harris is GAY

This is a sad, sad night for me

I have just discovered that the leading man of Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog is gay.
The shock of it all! Connor told me it was a rumour ='( Why must people hurt me in this way? He's the ladies man in How I Met Your Mother!

He plays it convincingly. Maybe there is hope. We could hire a hit man to do-in his boyfriend of 5 years :\

It'll work.
WE WILL MAKE IT WORK!
Female Neil Patrick Harris fans unite! Work towards this worthy, oh so worthy, cause.
You know you want to.

I can't put anything in there /\
Stupid space >_> *Curses*

\/ \/ Read *nod*\/ \/

Look it's Tim!

xD

In't he wonderful?

That is his stage,

and he lives in it.

Sorry, Beckett. That it took so long, but, I had to put Tim in! It's not a blog without Tim or a Tim reference/Quote/Tim Anything! Pictures are most definitely bitches.
Aaaalsooo... Sorry about you not being allowed to look at it. Blogspot hates me and my actual blog template disagrees with preview. Which is really fucked because preview is there to stop your blog from looking shit and, obviously, it's not doing its job. *Stabs Blogspot in the eye* HA! Dissolved your contacts! =3

Listening To: Dark Side - Tim Minchin - Dark Side

New '09 "thang"!

'I'm a social' - THEWHATTHEBUCKSHOW

^^ If that is your real name.

Anyway... it'll kick off, eventually.

"As you can see this is a kind of laid back sorta post"

Well. I officially have blog writers block.
The only thing I can think of to post is a poem about the words 'Cellar Door' because apparently Tolkien decided that the word 'door' said after the word 'cellar', regardless of their meaning, is the most beautiful, I don't what you'd call it... line, perhaps?, line, like, ever.
Wikipedia: 'Cellar door' and it'll come up with it. My memory's really bad at the moment so bear with me.

Well, Christmas was quiet. And New Years was quiet.
Family came 'round 3rd Jan and that was just peachy >_> note the sarcasm.
The less said about that, the better.

Lets just say my tipsy uncle who thinks I still have a boyfriend going on about 'it' in my presence didn't go down so well. He certainly changed his tone when I said 'how about you punch him in the face'. I thought it needed to be said. Hell, it need to be screamed from the roof tops.

Moving forward.

Truth and/or Dare is a fun game ^^ if anyway of you people who played that with me are reading this, then, good for you :)

Should be getting my laptop tomor-today. I was meant to be getting it Monday but the guy that does the deliveries went on leave for the holidays and has a shitload of backup.

So. All this goes to show that my holidays, so far, have been lacking in enjoyment. That's not counting Youtube and Tim and Piano and Tennis.


OH! TOPIC!


Good old tennis ^_^
I'm glad it's on two channels because you know what? I'm so fucking sick of cricket. You know, once I saw cricket related things on four different channels FOUR DIFFERENT CHANNELS... AT THE SAME FUCKING TIME! Nine, Ten, Seven and ABC. How about that? So 75% of Normal TV had been consumed by the most boring sport in the world. Yes, I find golf more exciting than cricket. At least I can *understand* golf.

And one of my friends takes it upon herself that tennis is on TV ALL THE TIME!
Uh huh... that's bullshit.
AFL is still on TV in Summer whether it be who won the Premiership, which player has died an unfortunate and surprising death and not to mention the endless supply of suspended players due to drug-related escapades.
Now answer me this: AFL players get payed well, yes? Well enough for sportsmen. If that is so then why the hell do they need to take drugs to get a kick? Why not hire a stripper or take a dip in the Yarra during Winter (which, may I mention, costs ZERO)? Maybe splashing around in a freezing river will knock some sense into these addicts? I don't know. I don't like football, I don't follow it, I don't understand it and I don't ever want to have anything to do with it... ever.


As I was saying.
Tennis! On two channels! EEP! :DDD
I do love tennis.
Stupid Casey Delacqua. Losing to Germany. IN HER FIRST ROUND! Bloody Australians.
Good on Lleyton though ^^ Yay.
And Yay Stosur (y) she looks so different :\

Oh I forgot you get 3 guaranteed matches in the Hopman Cup. Haha ^^" Mah Bad.
Oh well. Long live leftys?


Doctor Who: ='(
It's like Christopher Eccleston all over again!
That was okay.. We reaped the benefits.
David Tennant <3
But... Losing Tenninch is like Tim Minchin retiring and being replaced by his wife =
A dangerous prospect.
*OBLIVIATE*

Speaking of Lattinnn.
Been re-reading Harry Potter so when they screw up #6 I can complain about it with valid information =\ lolz.

Yeeeeep re-read #6 and the only thing I can remember about it is... Well... the more I think about it the more I remember it :D Horcruxes, Slughorn, SnapeySnape, Death, Destruction, SnapeySnape...

Oh, spoilers? Lol.

Now I'm reading #7.
It's like #6 on steroids with no Dumbledore. And because you haven't read the whole thing you don't know that SnapeySnape is the best character ever :\
So he's, like, replacement Dumbledore and it's brilliant. And when you read it for the third time, once you remember about Grindelwald and the taboo it's like what I like to refer to as 'The Lightbulb Effect', and everything just clicks into place ^^ it is brilliant.

Still don't like J.K. Rowling. She shits me.
Killing Sirius... that was a big mistake.
And she just doesn't seem happy enough for a multi-trillionaire :
Just a thought.

Anyyyywayyyyy.
I should be blogging epically whens I gets my laptop ^_^

And, please, 2009, come up with something but than 'epic' it's sooooooooo 2008
I mean, goshh.

Au Revoir... you lot.

Dobby ;_;

AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Tom Milsom replied to my Youtube comment! =D

I made him smile XDDDDDDD

Second Encore

All we really want is affirmation

Affirmation's all we're working towards.

But I don't need your wealth accumulation,

you can keep it.

Second encore,

second encore.

=3

Philosophical Contemplations of Psychological Inclinations

Skepticism & Feet

The Best Thing: You don't like the 'c' word but when Tim says it, it's okay.
Worst Thing: He is so brilliantly talented Musically and Verbally that it makes you feel really sad to listen to anything he does.

I'll always remember it as; The Night I Didn't Say Goodnight

That was a wonderful, uplifting and exhilerating experience.


I just pulled my first all-nighter! - With a friend
WHOOP!
Attempted to watch the sunrise but the sky sucks. I decided that I needed to kick the sky's ass.


It was the coke.
Thank you, coca-cola. You made this production possible.


Well, that was fun.
*Am determined not to fall asleep in the middle of the day*
Not making any promises.

Hexachordal = <3

He is the new Tim Minchin*. Hm... Would I go that far? Probably not... His English accent fails him a bit. But still, he's got one to start with.

In a word
AWESOME
In three words
I'D TAP THAT

=D

Tom Milsom is simply delectable. A mass of incandescent talent and genius and outright brilliance.

www.youtube.com/user/hexachordal

He plays piano (<3),

*Tim is God.

My Little Observation

"I've taken to writing interesting stuff in a book. It's a nice diversion from the annoyed sighs I get from disgruntled friends."

Yep, it's still going

This amounts up to her usual day at school; Smiling, laughing, having a great time with her friends, making stupid comments that you’ll remember forever. Not caring about what anyone on the outside thinks of you. It’s just you, your friends and your future with those that you love. The past means nothing now, it wasn’t even a mistake… it was a learning curve.

Forgetting your past would be the mistake.
Learning from your own errors and misjudgments is the greatest advice you will ever accept.
Other than;

Lies will lock you up with truth the only key.


Thank you, Missy Higgins.

Jennifer

IS THE BEST!!
Brandon sucks (n)

XD

EEP!

Now I don't feel.... a thing....

I'm not obsessed.
Well... I am... but that's not the point here.
I can't be obsessed with someone who I haven't seen for three days!
It's.... it's..... not right.
ARGH!
You better turn up tomorrow, you... you.... person.
Or so help me...
I'll annoy the heck out of my friends.
And, boy, will they be pissed with you.

Timothy Winters - Charles Causley

Dearest, loving, forgiving, ultimate diary,
Today I went on business, Welfare Business, to the Winters' household. And let me tell you...
This Timothy is a pretty good kid, in the personality sense. Everything else? Not so much. Pity he hasn't got a mother to nurture and take care of him.
His father is a drunk and I saw some empty gin bottles in the trash can (I noticed they weren't recycled. Not that it matters) and I wouldn't doubt that they belonged to the senile, off-her-face Grandmother - also a suspected alcoholic.
Timothy lives in terrible conditions in the bad part of town. The front door is off it's hinges and it opens the airway from the porch outside, right into the kitchen, where Timothy sleeps. In a sack. On the cold, untiled, insect-ridden floor.
As far as I know the boy does not have any friends, not because he's a bad kid but because other children are repulsed by him. His teeth, hair, his clothes and the area he lives in leave much to be desired. Put it this way, if was a child of 11, I wouldn't want to be his friend either. Children can be so cruel.
When I walked through the kitchen I saw an aspirin bottle almost totally obscured by Timothy's 'mattress' on the ground, ground, not floor. I also saw blood on the end of the sack.
So Timothy's Father and/or Grandmother are either giving him aspirin for some sort of injury, another questionable reason or he's stealing it, seeing as they displayed no acknowledgment of his existence while I was being shown absentmindedly through the house... I doubt they're giving it to him for medical reasons, if they're giving it to him at all.
The drunkard father... ugh. The less said about him the better. He is a disgusting, sorry excuse for a man, let alone a father. All I can say is he pays no attention to Timothy whatsoever. If Timothy's mother didn't carry him for nine months and his father didn't stick around for the birth, I wouldn't doubt that Timothy's dad, and I use the term loosely, would have been totally oblivious to having a son.
The grandmother does not deserve the title 'Grandmother' lets just leave it at that.
I think any parent or guardian would be thrilled to have Timothy as a son, grandson, nephew or cousin even. This child's Guardian's are definitely unfit and think of it as a burden rather than a blessing to have Timothy living under the same roof as them. I believe that Timothy should live with a foster family or adoptive parents. I also believe he'd be very willing to go, too.
This is why I have decided to write a report to the Welfare State about Timothy's situation. I know the laws are stupid and tricky but with the evidence I've found against Timothy's 'family' in his sorry excuse for a home I think the State will have no other choice than to remove him from his Grandmother's and his Father's 'care'.

Thank you, diary for your undivided attention. You helped clear my mind and make sense of this mess.
This is Renee signing off.
See you next time.
xo





Just something I wrote for English. It's based on the poem 'Timothy Winters' by Charles Causley. I'd put the poem up... but I'm too tired and lazy.
I hope you enjoyed it. I sure did.
:)

This amounts up to her usual day at school.

Skulking around the grounds and keeping to the walls of the corridors. Hiding her face at every chance she gets to avoid catching the eye of someone she'd rather forget about.

This amounts up to her usual day at school.

Putting on the bravest face she can and barging through the corridors, acting like she's superior, like she owns the place. Hiding behind a forced laugh every time she catches the eye of someone she'd rather forget about. All to appear normal, unscathed, unscarred and like she was never fucked over before in her life.

I like improving on old material (who are we kidding, it's material!). 'Tis fun like that. The second one sounds better yeah? Yeah... that's what I thought xD

Comments? Pwitty puh-weaze?

^^

**SPOILER ALERT**

So I'm thinking I'm so bored I may blog. Even though I dun' wanna.



There's been lots of copying and pasting and bitching and name-calling going around lately. Well, since Sunday, but that's beside the point.


Why do you have to be in such a nothing but angry and revengful mood and then a rational person just so happens to e-wander by, e-tap you on the shoulder and e-say, 'hey, Teagan. He's got problems and you were being a crazy bitch.'?


Kinda ruins the moment just a tad.



I seriously hate rationality sometimes and I curse myself for not being rational in the first place. I also curse stupid people. You all know the saying 'ignorance is bliss'? Well I'm guessing it's true.


But of course there are ignorant people that go and get themselves in a whole lotta shit. Then the rational person comes along and just mutters casually, 'don't worry about him, he made some bad choices and he knows it, but he's too stupid to know any better.'


Then there are the okay-looking, stupid, manipulative, two-faced, backstabbing, lying sons of bitches that grab a hold of you and don't let you go until there good and ready. And when they do let you go, they do it in such a way that you don't even know they've let you go. No matter how many stupid subtle hints they leave. When they're finally finished with you, they make the insane decision to say they made 'a big mistake', like they get that doe-eyed bambi in the headlights look and tell you they only made one. When they've really made five billion and two and don't they know it. It's almost rubbing your face in it really. Stupid people can be really smart sometimes.





Rant (and a half), um, over.

The spoiler T-Shirt.
You've been warned

An irregular gang of vampires

"My jet-lagged infant daughter, you'll be passed 'round the room like a puppy in a primary school."

-Tim Minchin

Have you noticed the little disability sign next to the space where you type in the captcha? It makes me lol. To think that they used an image, especially a disability image, as a link for people who can't read the captcha properly. What happens if you can't read pictures either? Or if your blind? Or if you're just really, really stupid. But I guess when they had to add captchas they thought it'd be real cool to use the universal sign for disabled people.

Why is that image the universal sign for a disability anyway? It's not as if everyone who's disabled is in a wheelchair.

I wish people would think things through before they go drawing pictures that are used internationally.

Goshh.

I r eccentric. Who said when? AHHHH!

You must not know 'bout me!
I got you babe.

Haha. Song lyrics are so fun.

You've change, Times New Roman.
GO BACK WHERE YOU CAME FROM!

Wowwwwwwwwwww. What a weird mood. Copying and pasting is unavoidable.
*nod*

That's like.... inviting Ryan to a Halloween party and expecting some randomly dressed vampire gang not to suck every drop of blood from his body then spray it back in his face before plucking out all his nose hairs and smashing his guitar into his balls.
Absolutely freakin' impossbile!

Direct your eyes downwards for more wacky adventures in the newly adapted series of Teagan's affairs of someone elses heart!

Being normal now... Well, as normal as I can be.
*Copies and pastes*

What actually happened was I really do hate telling this story, it’s tedious.

Rochelle and Ryan are going out after he dumped me because he didn’t ‘feel the same’ a.k.a. He liked her, and I went on hating her for no apparent reason (seriously don’t ask). Then Rochelle asks me the other day how long me and him had been going out for:

‘Hey, Teagan how long had you and Ryan been going out for?’
‘Does it really matter?’
‘Yes.’
‘Why don’t you ask him?’
‘I did and he told me 3’
‘It was 6’
‘Really?’
‘M’hm’

Then I walked away. That night Ellece tells me that I need to talk to Rochelle the next day because she had some interesting information. Rochelle said that she asked Ryan how long we’d been going out for, again, and he said 3, again. Ellece told me that Rochelle believed me and then we were all kinda friends.
Later on that same day we see Rochelle and she said that she called Ryan and he said that he’d called Ellece and she didn’t pick up and that he called me (he called me four times but I wasn’t in time enough to answer) and I said that we’d been going out for 3 months, which made me lol. Literally. So that’s why we all hate him and Rochelle’s no longer a bitch.


Now you all (anyone who reads this) know what went down.
Smash git if you see it? If you have a meat cleaver and a blunt axe handy that'd be even better.

Okay... Now the knee story.
More copying and pasting.
This time it's a text! How exciting!

Wait... it's Lemonade time...

'Are you about to trust a veterinary surgen who wears a golf hat? '

'Yes'
'He probably performs surgery with a gold club! Oh, nurse, can you pass me my nine iron?'

Lol@Battle wound. I'm sending this message to Ellece, Jenn and Mel. I just left a chunk of skin on a brick wall somewhere and it hurts like hell. Yall should see it. The wall dinted me. Kick it?

Good times... Not really it hurt lots but I'll get over it.

What I won't get over is Ryan's blatant disreguard for anyones feelings but his own. He can go fuck himself. It's ten times worse than it was before. I do hope you find and read this you son of a bitch.

Space out, maaaaaaaaan

I don't know

There are all these things.

Unanswerable questions
and unfathomable theories.

The unreachable dream
and unquestionable motive.

The anger and aborment flowing,
the uninhibited resentment.
The addition of butterflies,
making it unbearable.

The association of rum
with an exotic, unreachable pirate.

Pens with two colours
and unbelievably sharp scissors.

Smooth legs and blunt guillotines.

Vibrant colours and glasses for
citizens on the edge of blind.

Flashing orange lights
capturing your attention.

The infinite random events
you concoct to fill in the hours.

Songs from the 90's
filling your mind with
ideas of D-list celebrities.

Old forgotten friends
lighting the once
distinguished spark.

New programs, words, disasters.

Always trying to find
a different way of doing things

Bigger
Better
Original

Searching for a specific word
that hasn't been used by
anyone you know.

Discovering the new fad

Missing your favourite new show

Missing an old favourite

What to do

*Blush*

I got it all wrong
I'm such an idiot
Sorry, mate
>.<

Originally posted: 9/10 - Picking up the scraps

So I'm using the computer desk as my scrapbooking station. Shredding scraps of coloured paper and sticking words to it that most likely
amount to my personality.
Is that exciting enough for you?

I know why it happened though, it's all their fault. They're fucking jerks and I hate them to bits. I never even did a single thing to
them, never tread on their feet or stole their essay but obviously I'd done something to rub them up the the wrong way.
And now I'll never forget it.
Thank you so much for all your help, you miserable little cunts. From the bottom of my heart I am so grateful for what you have
done for and to me.
You unintentionally helped your friend get what she wanted, what good mates you are! So proud of you! Here's a gold star for your
achievment.
You have singlehandedly ruined my year. It would have been great from the beginning, but it never was and, now, the wreck of my
2008 lies at your feet. Go on, crush it some more. I dare you.

And as for you. Yeah, we're still friends but the blame really belongs to you. If you weren't such a shy, frigid idiot things would have
been a whole lot better not to mention a whole lot easier.
Moving fucked it up as well so a big hug to your mother.

The third member of the weird, twisted shit that went down...
Fuck you into the ground.
I wouldn't be glad if you died.
Then you'd have mourners.
I hope you treat him like shit.
If you must dance,
dance with the fucking devil.
You rub it in my face,
get treated better than I did.
You'll regret you were ever born.

I am so serious. I'm not just saying it because I feel cantankerous.
You will go down.
Thinking of saying a single word to me? Reconsider.
It may be the last thing you ever do.

Why do you even care that I bitch about you? Be the bigger man, take the high road. Get the fuck over it. I have so why can't you?
You're supposedly better than me. You're the nicer person, you've got heaps of really good friends. So just shut the fuck up.
Let me live my broken life in peace. I don't need any of these little confrontations you've got planned.
To me you aren't worth more than shit. I could care less about you and your stupid entourage.


Leave me alone and get out of my life.

Finish that damn sente--

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Finish The Sentence Survey


My ex... - is inexplicable

Maybe I should... - redecorate

I love... - pretzels and canvas

People would say that i'm... - easily distrac-- A FLY! *chases*

I don't understand... - how to make my left hand co-operate

When I wake up in the morning... - well what do you think?

I lost... - the game. Enough said

Life is full of... - raindrops on roses and girls in white dresses...

My past is... - haunting your mother

I get annoyed when... - you do stupid things

Parties are... - soooooo...sooo..... whoreish

I wish... - I had chocolate

Dogs... - nawsh

Cats... - eugh

Tomorrow... - noun. the day after today

I have low tolerance... - for mistakes

If I had a million dollars... - oh the havoc I would wreak

I'm totally terrified... - am not




Take This Finish The Sentence Survey and other href=http://www.quizopolis.com/>Fun Surveys at Quizopolis.com

BAND BUDDIE!!!!!

COATHANGER

TRAVIS RAPE

FANGS UP

REALLY REALLY REALLY

RIDICULOUSLY

GOOD-LOOKIN'

ICE ICE BRADIE

P. MONKEY

SLUT STACK

SHORT SLUT

PURPLE HOODIE

W00T!

<3

Jonas is hot =|

'it's ten o'clock and i've spent the whole day reading a book'

"Welcome to my world."

I am whole-heartedly addicted to LonelyGirl15. Don't you think it's about time they gave the show a name? Yeah, sure, the second series has a name but what about the first one! "Bree's Blog" doesn't quite cut it.

LG15.com

Join the Breeniverse

I've been watching these webisodes since 4 something yesterday and went to bed at, like, 2 something in the morning. It is SO DAMN ADDICTIVE!

I haven't even watched half of it and I've been watching it all day. 'Til about 5:30pm I think. Then the net cut out so I took a break for Doctor Who. SEASON FINALE! FTW!

So much..... DOCTOR DONNA! *Drool*

What colour do you use for Doctor Who...? Green is good. I guess.

YAYYYYY FRUIT SALAD!

Gosh I am in such a good mood. Considering I'm not BORED OUT OF MY MIND!!! Anymore.

xD

Au Revoir - Teagan

Faction: THE RESISTENCE

Grammar :o

'You've gotta pick yourself up,

Take another look

And dust yourself off

cause life's too good,

I'll say it to myself

and I'll say it again

Love will never end'

So you know what it feels like when you just want to create something... and you really don't know what it is. You're just feeling so...creative! And you don't know whether it's, like, woodwork or poetry or fiction or photography or drawing or music or scrap booking or acting or singing... you just want to make something. To accomplish something. Especially after a very inspirational book. Followed by an inspirational movie.

So what better thing to create... than a blog?

Still isn't as fulfilling as talking to someone about something... deep... something that's been plaguing you. Even if you don't know what it is, you still know there's something there...

I just need to talk to someone that I don't even know. To someone that has no idea about what's happened and what's happening. Someone that doesn't have any preconceived opinions about anyone or anything. It has to be someone I don't know. But someone that's like me, someone that understands me. Sure, my friends get me. But in a friend way. I need a strangers perspective. Fresh ideas. New insight. The perfect person who doesn't judge a book by it's cover and has all the answers. The epitome of the ideal human being. The type of person you can't help but love because they're the best at everything and you can only admire them for it. They are whatever gender you want them to be. In my case, it would be a male. A guy that loves you for who you are. In a friend way. And you love him back. In a friend way. When you're with him you don't forget all your troubles, life doesn't work that way. You talk through them, sort them out.

I guess I created something... the perfect person, eh? Aren't I inventive... Could be the beginning of a novel. Ummaaahh.

That would be nice though. Someone to talk to about anything and everything. For the sake of talking. It wouldn't fix everything, but it'd make it bearable.

Cheers and Au Revoir to anyone who was thoughtful enough to read this tedious drivel.

xo

Well you got caught with a flat. Well, how 'bout that

Eh.

That is all.

ThatGreenGentleman

Sugarcane in the easy morning
So what'd you think I would say?
Bet you thought that I'd be broken
You want a piece of me?
Watch your mouth
I've got the poison, I've got the remedy.

Two o'clock and I wish that I was sleeping
something's on my mind
oh god it's so frustrating
just shutup.
It's gonna happen, it's meant to happen
time to confess
that was many years ago
you can tell how it felt
in just seven days.

From underneath the trees
Sit you down
just beyond the bars
the dark side of the moon
I'll still be loving you
It's astounding
you're so hot that I melted

Now, my friend
someone told me
that lies will lock you up with truth the only key
there's little point in dwelling on the past
leave it to me

I hope you hang yourself
Your friends all plead for you to stay
back to the street
well that all depends
you know I read it in a magazine.

All the wrong you've done
makes me crinkle my nose

I'm in surgery
You are the father of humanity
that's all very well but
in the closet
the best thing;
songs for you.

I'm coming out
in a tick, sir
There must be something
this was never the way I planned.

I get down on my knees
and sing out loud
'I want you, beautiful'

What would you do if I sang
outside your house
'Hello!
Attention! Attention!
I know a place that we can go to
let me take you there.'

What you been doin'?
I'd like to ask you some questions
there is no room for doubt
chew it up and spit it out
all I need is you.

There's a hole in the world like a great black pit
If they just knew
You make me love you



PanicattheDiscoParamoreJordynTaylorBritneySpearsSweeneyToddJasonMrazJordinSparksMikaJoeBrooksBlackEyedPeasKisschasyChadKroegerSatanaTheRockyHorrorPictureShowNickelback3DoorsDownDeltaGoodremMissyHigginsKatyPerryLinkinParkEltonJohnColbieCallaitBenLeeTimMinchinBeyonce`SecondhandSerenadeTheKillersEndOfFashionPeteMurrayTheGooGooDollsRihannaTheAcademyIsPlainWhiteTsAshleeSimpsonPinkKateMiller-HeidkeMileyCyrus

7 Things

I probably shouldn't say this
But at times I get so scared
When I think about the previous
Relationship we've shared

It was awesome but we lost it
It's not possible for me not to care
Now we're standing in the rain
But nothin's ever gonna change until you hear, my dear

The 7 things I hate about you
The 7 things I hate about you (oh you)
You're vain, your games, you're insecure
You love me, you like her
You make me laugh, you make me cry
I don't know which side to buy
Your friends they're jerks
When you act like them, just know it hurts
I wanna be with the one I know
And the 7th thing I hate the most that you do
You make me love you

It's awkward and it's silent
As I wait for you to say
What I need to hear now
Your sincere apology
When you mean it, I'll believe it
If you text it, I'll delete it
Let's be clear
Oh I'm not coming back
You're taking 7 steps here

The 7 things I hate about you
You're vain, your games, you're insecure
You love me, you like her
You make me laugh, you make me cry
I don't know which side to buy
Your friends they're jerks
When you act like them, just know it hurts
I wanna be with the one I know
And the 7th thing I hate the most that you do
You make me love you

And compared to all the great things
That would take too long to write
I probably should mention
The 7 that I like

The 7 things I like about you
Your hair, your eyes, your old Levi's
And when we kiss, I'm hypnotized
You make me laugh, you make me cry
But I guess that's both I'll have to buy
Your hand in mine
When we're intertwined everything's alright
I want to be
With the one I know
And the 7th thing I like the most that you do
You make me love you
You do (oh)

Nathan Hobby

'There would not be the grand revelation he had always
imagined, Instead, only the steady drag of the minute hand that
pushed the future into the present and then beat it into the past
and turned all possibilities into spent realities.'

'...He felt lonely. Books are wholly inadequate
substitutes for humans and humans are wholly inadequate
substitutes for books, he thought, and even as he felt a small
satisfaction with the idea, he realised it wasn't very witty, just
vaguely true.'

'I fear this is my pinnacle

my vitalest moments

to slip away in this library

learning about others long gone.

Where is the world?

Is it here among the books? Or

through the window, in the sunshine?'

Rainbow, rainbow in the air,

how is it that you fair...

Floating in a sky that stretches into infinite dwellings. You can swim forever so long as you bring me your pot of gold.

Rejoice, my minions. It is finished!

The Modern Elizabethan Sonnet

These poems are sending me quite insane
Why do they have to have ten syllables?
What was on his mind in these Elizabethan
years? Shakespeare must have lost his marbles.
Don’t give us this sort of strain in these times.
Our generation wouldn’t take the time
to create these sorts of intricate lines.
They’re too interested in make-up to rhyme.
Is this long enough to be complete?
Does it have the right rhythm for a sonnet?
Does the emotion conform to the beat?
Will Ms. A unleash her wrath upon it?
Finally it’s over and done with
No more sonnets for me here forthwith!

Oh my beloved

Dictionary.com went and changed on me.

Ode to dictionary.com

I go to you when I'm at a loss for words
You're there when I need a synonym
You're there when I want the meaning of 'Herefords'
You're my shoulder to lean on, or my limb
I don't know how I'd write without you
You decipher the meaning of 'monastic'
Absence of the latter is taboo
You double as a thesaurus; fantastic!
Dictionary.com, please, never leave me,
your presence on the Internet is welcome.
You define words like Schmaltzy and shrewdly,
to your charms I will always succumb.
Oh, my thesaurus, my reference,
You dispense a kind but regal guidance


What I'm trying to say is. You can be black, white or blue but, please, never cease to exist.

Well you done done me

I'm coming out of my cage
And I've been doing just fine
Gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all

It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this

It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss

Now I'm falling asleep
And she's calling a cab
While he's having a smoke
And she's taking a drag
Now they're going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it's all in my head

But she's touching his-chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, letting me go
And I just can't look its killing me
And taking control

Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Swimming through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it's just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
'Cause I'm Mr Brightside

I'm coming out of my cage
And I've been doing just fine
Gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this

It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss

Now I'm falling asleep
And she's calling a cab
While he's having a smoke
And she's taking a drag
Now they're going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it's all in my head

But she's touching his-chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, letting me go

Cause I just can't look its killing me
And taking control

Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Swimming through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it's just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes

'Cause I'm Mr Brightside

I never...
I never...
I never

Silence in the Library

The Vashta Nirada bring people together.
Into close, tight-nit groups of four.

But no one likes to mention that those groups
used to be groups of seven.

Time to celebrate the migration of flesh-eating swarms.

This Mutiny

So I sit and wonder what the point to all this is
Where’s the heart in this disloyalty?
Inside I know that you really don’t care
about me, or anything I do.

So I sit and wonder why I keep on trying
when I know there’s no end to this betrayal
I’m only falling…

I can’t go back
I’ve gotta keep on moving
shutting myself in this corner
isn’t gonna keep me going.
Hoping there’ll be a brighter day
in this hopeless life,
hoping there’ll be an end to this mutiny.

You say you didn’t mean it
but I know that you did.
There’s no way you’re getting out of this
‘cause I’m not burying the hatchet.

So I sit and wonder why I keep on trying
What are you getting out of this?
You know I’m dying…

I can’t go back
I’ve gotta keep on moving
shutting myself in this corner
isn’t gonna keep me going.
Hoping there’ll be a brighter day
in this hopeless life,
hoping there’ll be an end to this mutiny.

Forgive me you say?
You know that’s impossible
You think you’re cunning?
I think you’re gay.

Can’t go back
Gotta keep on moving
shutting myself in this corner
isn’t gonna keep me going.
Hoping there’ll be a brighter day
in this hopeless life,
hoping there’ll be an end to this mutiny.

This mutiny
This mutiny
This mutiny…

Blogspot whores?

I think... the reason you all have two blogs is purely to add to my confusion.
Not because you all have split personalities, different views on life, philosophical, random and wondering minds but just to make it just that more difficult for me to find you all. 'Sides one person. The only normal person to have only one blog. Thank you, one person.

Just for a little punishment. If you actually end up reading this.

I LOST THE GAME

You're very welcome.

xx

Just thought I'd post a little...

This is Homer Simpsons very famous Beer song. You really HAVE to sing this to get the full effect, you can sing it to the tune of Doe a Deer ....


DO-RE-MI-BEER, by Homer J. Simpson

DOUGH... the stuff... that buys me beer...
RAY ..... the guy that sells me beer...
ME...... the guy...who drinks the beer,
FAR..... the distance to my beer.
SO...... I think I'll have a beer.
LA...... La, la la la la beer
TEA..... no thanks, I'm drinking beer...
That will bring us back to...
(Looks into an empty glass)
D'OH!

Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make all of them yourself.

How to write gooder

1. Allways use a spel cheker.
2. Avoid long complex sentences which go on and on without using any punctuation to break up the long sentences as this can lead to confusion as people read your text
3. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.) (You mark my words)
4. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
5. Employ the vernacular.
6. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
7. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary (and unwanted).
8. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
9. Contractions aren't necessary.
10. Avoid alliteration. Always.
11. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
12. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
13. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
14. One should never generalize.
15. Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.
16. Be more or less specific.
17. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
18. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
19. The passive voice is to be avoided.
20. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
21. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
22. Exaggeration is a million times worse than understatement.
23. Who needs rhetorical questions?
24. Understatement is always best.
_________________________________________________________

Letter of Resignation

Saturday August 30 2008
Pretzel Enterprises
123 Pretzel lane, Pretzelville

Dear Pretzelhead,

This is to formally notify you that I am resigning from Pretzel Enterprises as Jehovah's assistant.
I regret to inform you that today will be my last day of employment.
I want to thank you for all you have not done for me in my employment here,
and for wasting my life in serving a management team who are obviously
inbred.
Sincerely,


The Messiah,
Jehovah's assistant
_________________________________________________________

An interesting anagram

Mother-in-law = Woman Hitler

_________________________________________________________

How to give a cat a pill:

1) Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2) Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3) Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

4) Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right fore-finger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5) Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

6) Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7) Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

8) Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9) Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10) Retrieve cat from neighbour's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

11) Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss-back another shot. Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12) Ring fire brigade to retrieve the fuc-ing cat from tree across the road. Apologise to neighbour who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap.

13) Tie the little bastard's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.

14) Consume remainder of Scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.

15) Arrange for RSPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and ring local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.












How to give a dog a pill:
1) Wrap it in bacon.

_________________________________________________________

A genuine excerpt from complaints written to Landlords:
Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.

Don't you just want to kick him in the head?
___________________________________________________________________

How to drive other people insane

1) At lunchtime, sit in your parked car and point a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

2) Page yourself over the intercom. (Don't disguise your voice.)

3) Insist that your e mail address be:'xena-goddess-of-fire@companyname.com' or 'Elvis-the-king@companyname.com'

4) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

5) Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronised chair dancing

6) Put your waste bin on your desk and label it 'IN.'

7) Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.

8) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks.Once everyone has gotten overtheir caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

9) Reply to everything someone says with a sneering"That's what you think."

10) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."

11) Adjust the tint on your monitor so that the brightness levellights up the entire working area. Insist to others that you like it thatway.

12) Don't use any punctuation

13) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

14) Ask people what sex they are.

15) Specify that your drive through order is "to go."

16) Sing along at the opera.

17) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

18) Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if your boss is the opposite gender.)

19) Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them whatyou're doing. For example: "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."

20) Put mosquito netting around your cubicle.

21) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their,party 'cause you're not in the mood.

22) Leave the photocopier set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17" paper, 99 copies.

23) If you have a glass eye, tap on it with your pen while talking to others.

24) Insist on keeping your car windscreen wipers running in all weather conditions 'to keep them tuned up'.

25) Highlight irrelevant material in scientific papers and 'cc' them to your boss.

26) Disassemble your pen and 'accidentally' shoot the cartridge across the room.

27) Shout random numbers while someone is counting.

28) Staple papers in the middle of the page.

29) Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the till.

30) TYPE ONLY IN UPPERCASE or iN a ComBinAtIon of UpPeR and lOWerCAsE ChaRACtErS.

31) Try playing the William Tell Overture (the Lone Ranger theme tune) by tapping on the bottom of your chin or your teeth with a pen or your nails. Just before the end, announce: "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat again and again.

32) While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.

33) Use the word " like " over and over every 3-4 words. For Example ; ".. and like, he was like - in the car like, and so drunk that like, he couldn't even like get out of it !"

_______________________________________________________

How do you put Pikachu into a Bus?

Pokemon

What has loads of keys but can't open doors?

A piano

_________________________________________________________

Tired of those man boobs?

WELL HAVE THEM WHIPPED AWAY WHEN YOU TAKE THE NO REST NO EATING DIET!

It consists of you running around till you get skinny, if your hungry then THINK AGAIN!

There is NO EATING in this diet!

JOIN NOW! FOR ONLY...$1, THIS IS A ONCE IN A LIFE TIME OFFER!

DONT BOTHER ABOUT READING THE DETAILS OF THE DIET!

BECAUSE YOU DONT NEED TO.

THIS DIET WILL NOT EFFECT YOUR HEALTH AT ALL*!!!

*Diet my cause extreme cases of death..

By Ellece


_________________________________________________________
How pointless ._.